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Posts archive for: 5 May, 2008
  • Teenage Kicks

    Does anybody want anything from the shops ?

    A tiara and a pony ?

    2 litres of cider and 40 fags ?

    An extra 100 decibels ?

    Everything that has gone before or ever will be again, trampled underfoot in ridiculous footwear ?

    2ft hair extensions or a shaved head ?

    Anything you can get by fractions of an ounce ?

    ( And always remember, what you can't buy you can always borrow and break )

    Actual question posed :

    'What are you like?'

    Actual answer given :

    A Knobhead...

    Case closed ...

    M'Ludd-ite-shitelings !

    (Bless 'em !!!)

  • Today I Mostly Did Tractors

    I've had a lovely weekend...

    On Friday it was a birthday dinner (hosted by a friend for another friend) with a starter, mains and four puds. I think mine won. It was a simple yet elegant concoction of raspberries, strawberries and blueberries soaked in elderflower cordial, meringues and cream. We had a dozen cocktails followed by a couple of bottles of wine each, then there was charades and singing (lots and lots of singing...with alto harmonies...I think) ...and the tom-toms and maracas came out with the schnapps, and we all ended up mascara-down in the Sainsbury 'Taste The Difference ' birthday cake with the candles up our noses.

    On Saturday morning there was a parental call for help (flooded flat... left the bathtaps on for 2 hours... again)...marigolds and hangover to the rescue.

    Then six trips to the tip with all the flotsam and jetsam that has washed up in the house over the last ten years (did I say all ?... I meant some.) When a lad is a teen he reallyshouldn't have 30 pairs of skids for 'age 6-7'...nor should his dad have 40ft of old Scaletrix and Thomas-the-Tank Engine' track in his sock-drawer ... and the rest.

    But you know how it is...

    All broken rocking-horses, biscuits and bubbles !

    But my big buzz was that

    Today I got to drive a big red tractor !

    And I didn't crash into nuffink or nobody !!

    Just call me 'Tractor-Girl '...I insist.

    I was dead made-up, me !!

    *Dons dungarees and lippy *

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